We used to talk on the phone about my career, important stuff like that. Now this wedding is my life. IT IS THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS.

Mom: "Cookies. We need to talk about Italian cookies." Daughter: "We're going to have those for dessert, right?"

Mom: "Yeah, but the guest list is getting big. I mean, 300 people or more. We might have to have everyone bring some Italian cookies."

Daughter: "I know, that's a lot of people."

Mom: "300 people! If everyone has three, that's like 900 cookies. That's something like 80 dozen cookies, Cara..."